The noises of Bologna.

I think sounds are a huge sense for me...might be my favorite sense. Each city has a different symphony. California's song to me involves a mix of Hoku's "Perfect Day," the ocean's waves crashing on the shore and my mother and father's voice. California is home. Denver's to me is the mountain wind and splashing of puddles somehow intertwined with my best friend's laughter. Denver has a piece of my heart as well...it's not home but it's where my college days are...where I grew up most and learned the toughest lessons. Bologna, on the other hand, has a song like any other I've heard. It's crazy but Bologna can become home..I can let it in, because I hear God's voice. Allow me to explain...

I love being alone. People don't think I'm solitary but, in fact, I crave it when I'm around people too much. Sorry, but I love thinking, actually hearing my own thoughts, and just looking at the world around me in peace.

Walking alone is one of my favorite things, especially here in Bologna, because I love the sensation of being SURROUNDED by people and still being alone. On this one particular walk, I went down Via Indipendenza. I'll try to describe it as best as possible to you - shops everywhere, cobble stones, traffic, congestion, and this architectural genius of a church...I wish I could show you pictures.

I don't know the name but my mom wants me to pray and I hadn't done it in a while and I figured, it's time, Gia. I walked into this church...first having a little trouble with the door and it ended up making a huge slam...Gia always making a damn entrance. I know I'm a "character," if you will, but sometimes I wish mine was different...a little bit more refined, but oh well. Gotta love who you are, flaws and all.

Just one other person praying...absolute silence. My footsteps are the loudest thing in this church - such a dramatic change from right outside on crazy Via Indipendenza. I always like lighting candles for people in these ancient churches. Today's candle would be for my dad, Marino Zoller. The strict, straight-forward, jokester of a dad I had...he was the best doctor in the world. I prayed for him, said I loved him...and thanked him for being my guardian angel.

I sat down, closed my eyes and knelt down.

Dear Jesus, what's up? How are you today? You must be so busy...it's almost Sunday! You need a vacation! Okay I'll cut the crap...I'd like to talk to you actually. I wanted to say I can't thank you enough for allowing me to somehow make my way to Italy. You knew I always wanted to go and just like that, I'm here. The impossible doesn't seem so impossible anymore now that I've been able to come out here. Please help me succeed here...allow me to open my heart to everyone. Let them see I am a friend and will help them if they need it. Please take care of my mom..let her not feel as stressed. Please take care of my grandma...I know she's older God so just let her last days be happier and full of love. Oh my gosh and my BROTHER! Miklos needs helps with where to go to college. That boy is so smart, God. Thanks for giving him that. WHY DIDN'T I GET THOSE GENES? It's okay, we won't go into this, you do everything for some grand reason, huh? I'm sure I'll understand someday...and even if I don't, it's okay. You know what? Because you're like the eighth wonder of the world. Stay mysterious. That's the beauty of faith, isn't it? We just have to believe. If we knew why things happened, we would be miserable. Wow, thanks...okay I should just go with the flow and not be so uptight. Everyone thinks I'm so relaxed but I do worry, God..but right here, right now, in this random church in Bologna, I am putting all my worries in your hands. You'll know what to do. I trust you, Lord. I always will. Thank you.

That's generally how my prayers go. My stream of consciousness gets really worried and then, as if God's guiding my thoughts in the right direction, I hit sanity again and am centered. He's truly a light in the darkness and he leads me to safety. In Bologna, I feel safe. I am surrounded by good people. That's all it takes for me to fall in love with a place - good people. You know what this means? I know I struggled beforehand because of how different Bologna was than what I expected but...

I love Bologna, officially. Yay it happened!!!!!

I realized I smiled to myself on the way back home...it was utterly reassuring.

I'm in the right place. Listen to God, he's all around you. Bologna's symphony is God saying, "Welcome home, Gia."